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My Poetry and Commentary on Life

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  • Semi-Quick Response to The Memory Police by Yoko Ogawa. 

    by

    art, attention, awareness, books, control, erasure, essay, interpretation, Language and Literacy, literacy, literature, memory, narrative, past, quotes, reader response, reading, response, social construction, ways of knowing

    I finished the Memory Police last night, but couldn’t summon enough energy to write a response. It was curious. It was interesting. It was ART!! Were there great lines and thoughts? Yes. Did it make sense? Not at first glance, which this response is. The novel (as the blurb on the back states) takes place on an unknown island where objects keep disappearing. Disappearing completely, even from the memory of most of the people on the island. Those who can still remember are taken away to some unknown place, for some unknown fate by the Gestapo-like Memory Police.  The last sentence of the blurb says “The Memory Police is a stunning novel about the trauma of loss.” I guess that is true, but only on one level. I would say it is more about the control of a community’s narrative; How history can be erased, and how we all just go along. How writing extends and saves individual memory for the next generations, who lose and save and create their own memories. How small seemingly unimportant objects can embody massive recollections. 

    Random Thoughts/Questions: None of the characters have names. There is a narrator, the novelist; the old man, who used to be the ferryman before the ferry disappeared, and R, who does not forget. The novelist is writing a novel, which sporadically we (the reader) get to read.Is the old man an allusion to Charon? Are the people who forget dead? The narrator is writing a novel, but loses her voice and can’t remember how to write. R, who used to proofread the narrator’s novels, keeps encouraging her to write, almost like editors who finish novelists books posthumously. Does “R” stand for reader? which is us, as we try to create meaning out of other’s incomplete memories?

    Quotes:

    “When I was a child, the whole place seemed… a lot fuller, a lot more real. But as things got thinner, more full of holes, our hearts got thinner, too, diluted somehow, I suppose that kept things in balance… And even when the balance begins to collapse, something remains.”

    “I have the feeling my voice may come back one day if I study the letters imprinted on the used ribbon.”

    “I’d imagine you’d be uncomfortable, with your heart full of so many forgotten things.”

    “Memories don’t just pile up—- they also change over time. And sometimes they fade of their own accord.”

    “Each one of us hides them away in secret. So, since out adversary is invisible, we are forced to use out intuition. It is extremely delicate work. In order to unmask these invisible secrets, to analyze and sort and dispose of them, we must work in secret, to protect ourselves.”

    “Memories are a lot tougher than you might think. Just like the hearts that hold them”

    “When you lost your voice, you lost the ability to make sense of yourself.”

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  • Remember This Now for Later

    by

    abstract, agency, attention, poetry, politics, process, trust, truth, ways of knowing

    even memory becomes a lie—

    that was a truth, and so goes

    the old paradox— out of truth

    a lie to beget yet another.


    The hollowness must be filled.

    So, the words fall into the holes

    like wet sand, thick and dark

    until the voices have stopped;


    until the voice becomes itself:

    pervasive like white static

    smoothing all to a null point

    where what we know is allowed.


    I know my truth for now:

    one thing leads to another

    (October 6, 2025)

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  • Media Res

    by

    agency, awareness, borders, change, courage, despair, fear, poetry, politics, present, sonnets

    terra incognita, terra pericolosa

    We run from shadows

    to shadow

    without explanations.

    We are here:


    for a moment;

    to wait,

    to watch,

    to worry.


    Yet, here now,

    light flows

    in shadows

    only here.


    So, be wary,

    be warned, and run.

    (October, 5, 2025)

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  • One Can Only Do What One Can Do

    by

    agency, anxiety, chance, change, fear, hope, love, poetry, politics, sonnets, time, tired, ways of knowing, words, worry

    Night continues to fall, dark upon dark, 

    unrelenting, cold as eternity.

    Yet, tonight a half-moon hangs in the stars.

    I try to ignore the fear on the wind,

    but it eats its way in, splintering bone.

    Ice, like a steel knife rusting at our throat,

    parses words to an elemental degree.

    What can be said contains but small nuance.

    So I write pinching syllables like rice

    to keep starvation one more day away,

    hoping without hope that what I can say

    is enough to carry hope through this dark,

    that whatever bit of love which remains

    is enough to hold our world together.

    (October 3, 2025)

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  • fall into the things that change

    by

    abstract, agency, attention, change, life, poetry, ways of knowing

    the small things:

    the weather,

    people’s names;

    any number of unconscious

    tic marks

    on unacknowledged

    lists, 



    lists which you have

    grown like bark

    to create a stability

    which permits you

    to falsify, in some way,



    some sense 

    of integrity as day

    bends to another day

    which has somehow

    changed

    without you

    (September 28, 2025)

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  • Soundtrack to my Life: Late Teens/Early Twenties

    by

    poetry

    This album from 1979 came up briefly in a long conversation with some friends Monday. As a result I have been listening to it fairly often over the last few days, which is no where near how much I listened to it back in 1979. We saw him play twice at the Armadillo that year, and several more times over the subsequent years. Twice just Cale on a piano..at the Continental Club, and a freezing night at the Ritz. Great album by one of the founding members of The Velvet Underground.

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  • Quick Take: Tales From Ovid by Ted Hughes

    by

    books, mythic, reader response, reading, response

    Finished this today. Kind of like The Metamorphoses’ Greatest Hits. That is not a criticism. I had not heard of some of the tales, and I liked the non-bowlderized versions of the others, having read most of the tales in kids versions to my children decades ago. It was a fun read. If you see it used somewhere, it is worth picking up. Trivia for some of you guys: Ted Hughes was married to Sylvia Plath. ( I like pointing that out since he was apparently an ass to her. Now to the younger readers, he is a footnote to her. He was no slouch as a poet, however. The Crow is especially good as I remember).

    September 24, 2025)

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  • fall equinox

    by

    anxiety, autumn, borders, change, climate change, cycle, fall, fear, haiku, patterns, poetry, sonnets, summer, syllabics, tanka, time, transition, worry

    earth turns towards the sun

    trees abandon their crisp leaves

    the kidney wood blooms


    the heat in texas

    hangs heavily in the air

    summer will not leave


    lizards sprint sprightly

    across the back patio

    no rain for weeks now


    they warn it will end

    even now summer lingers

    like a slow sickness


    everything unfolds slowly

    we are here then we are not

    (September 22, 2025)

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  • Last Rites (2)

    by

    agency, aging, control, forgiveness, life, meditation, poetry, present, revision, time

    O the hell

    we must breathe

    with the dust

    of redemption 

    as our ghosts whisper 

    — revising our past —

    our skin glows

    with angelic sweat

    like saints gilded

    in gold leaf

    over brick arches

    in byzantine cathedrals

    all these obligations

    we must attend to

    as the day descends

    and night grows

    from shadow

    nearby

    (September 19, 2025)

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  • PTSD: School Daze

    by

    agency, breach, broken, control, despair, dream, frustration, memoir, school, school existential angst, teaching

    I had a dream/nightmare this morning. I was returning to  a teaching job at a high school where I taught English Literature and Composition 14 years ago. The dream began at an English Department meeting where we were being introduced to a newly purchased curriculum that emphasized teaching the students how to spell. The curriculum came with “can’t fail lessons” and lots of pre-made, easy to grade, worksheets. I was arguing against the program, of course. I tried to explain the benefits of teaching reading and writing through a workshop system, of course. No one was listening to me, or the presentation from the district, of course. Instead, the other teachers spent the time complaining about their students and the administration, of course.  Richard, my friend, tried to calm me down, but I took it as he was just patronizing me to get me to shut up. The meeting broke up. I wandered the halls looking for my classroom. I realized that no one had shown me where I was supposed to teach. The halls were crowded. It seemed to be lunch, since no one was in any of the classrooms, instead they were milling about in the common areas. Teachers rushed about, overwhelmed. Students gossiped, politely ignoring me as I walked around the building, lost. I never should have come back to teaching, I thought. I should quit now, I thought. But I can’t quit. I need the money: If I quit, I won’t have any income, I thought. I kept walking around the building in a growing panic. I didn’t know where to go. I woke up, as I remembered that I was retired, that I had a pension, that I wasn’t teaching anymore. That I did not have to teach anymore. It was over. It was over.

    (September 10, 2025)

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  • family stories (1): Leave Them Guns Alone

    by

    family, memoir, memory, narrative, perspective, storytelling, time

    This is how this story goes, or at least what I can remember from how Dad told it. I have probably told this story as many, if not more, times than my dad. Uncle Les had gone off to college in the late 1800’s.  Every now and then a letter from him would arrive that first semester, and then they didn’t. My Grandfather Noel, Les’ brother, saddled up his horse and rode off to check on things. When he arrived, Les’ dorm room appeared as if Les had just walked out and would return any minute. He had been missing for several months. Then years later, around 1906, when my dad was three years old, a man came riding up to the “dirt” farm Noel struggled to eek a living from out near Liberty Hill. The man had two large saddle bags draped over his horse, two bandoliers criss-crossing his chest, and two large pistols hanging from his hips. The man was Uncle Les. After he dismounted, he walked into the house and hung his pistols from a peg on the wall. Les never touched those guns again. “Leave those guns alone, Ralph They’re nothing but trouble,” my Grandmother Pearl told the excited three year old. Les took his saddle bags out to the barn where he slept for the next 7 years as he worked for his brother on the farm for room and board.  After seven years, Les took the almost forgotten saddle bags and bought a ranch out west. Even as children, we saw the holes in Dad’s story: Where did Les get the money for his ranch? Noel only paid him with food and a place to sleep. Where had Les been all those years after disappearing from his college? What had he been doing? After being gone for so long, why did he wait for seven years before he bought his ranch? What was in those two saddle bags? Was any of what Dad said over the years about Les true in any way? How much have I filled in the holes of my memory with conjecture?

    (September 7, 2025)

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  • Every Love Story is a Comedy

    by

    allegory, alone, interrelationships, lonely, love, melodrama, narrative, poetry, prose poem, storytelling

    He didn’t know how to act, and had no script to follow. She knew her part without book, and said all her lines with ease. This was, she pointed out, not her first time in this role. It was, he thought, a true love story, not just another chance for her to reprise a stock character. Repeatedly, she set the scene, hitting her mark, an easy cue to follow.  Scene after scene, he vaguely wandered the stage, wishing he knew what to say; wishing he knew what to do; unable to act on his desires. She was confused. What was his motivation? Why wouldn’t he act? Why did he not respond correctly? Eventually, the farce ended as it began, without preamble, or resolution. Some one laughed in the wings, followed by a slow clap. Then, like a ghost, she left the stage, leaving him to ponder their performance alone, as the lights slowly faded past memory.

    (September 5, 2025)

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  • At the Speed of Life

    by

    abstract, aging, dream, half sonnets, life, meditation, memory, poetry, present, sonnets, time

     It’s rumored one sees

    as you die one’s life.


    What if what one sees

    is the life as lived


    unfolding in time

    so fleeting, yet vast?


    Each momentarily

    a live memory


    not a life once lived

    but the life you have.


    Then it disappears

    as if in a dream


    of which one forgets

    without waking up.

    (September 4, 2025)

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  • A Line Comes to Me Then Leaves

    by

    agency, aging, lament, language, poetry, sonnets, ways of knowing, words

    My world, which Words have created,

    has fallen into a deafening aphasia.

    Increasingly, 

    as if rearranging letter blocks,

    I misread words in the poem

    Like “words” for “worlds—”or

    “worlds” for “words—”

    Just an aging typo of the mind.

    Like a sailor blown overboard

    into a raging sea, I cannot

    swim within my thoughts,

    cannot ride the wave’s surface

    without tumbling into the foam

    to drown without a lexicon.

    (August 28, 2025)

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  • Classroom Norms

    by

    anger, awareness, broken, children, fear, frustration, haiku, paradigms, patterns, pessimism, poetry, school, school existential angst, worry

    Just another day:

    the children go off to school;

    students are gunned down. 

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