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My Poetry and Commentary on Life

  • This Writer’s Beginnings: EarlyYears
  • Bread Loaf Influence
  • Rock and Roll High School
  • About

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  • Closure

    by

    choice, erato, eros, loss, love, poetry, relationships
    There were no consequences
    To fear—
    Other than the possibility
    Which disappeared.

    (August 14, 2017)

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  • Taciturn

    by

    communication, erato, eros, love, poetry, relationships
    He spoke briefly,
    Quietly of love.
    He said what he meant
    As he said it—
    and now
    Years after.
    (August 14, 2017)

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  • You’re Fooled, I’m Fooled

    by

    abstract, language, meaning, poetry, sonnets, thinking
    the words we use use us but
    who listens to one’s own voice
    it is the ubiquitous background
    the foreground to the lost truth
    there is no ground no fulcrum
    to pitch the argument away
    the curve turns all back to one
    as if what anyone says matters
    when all matters as much as one
    the horizon flattens the earth’s curve
    to a singular eye oblivious to all
    except itself in relation to itself
    I look into the mirror only to see
    You a construct I don’t understand

    (August 12, 2017)

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  • Art Opening

    by

    ego, essay, hubris, life, memoir, memory, resistance, summer, ways of knowing, writing
    Austin, Texas: circa 1980
    We were at an art opening, somewhere downtown near the warehouses where small machine parts were stored, before the buildings were turned into fashionable bars for the newly minted college graduates looking for places to spend their first independent incomes in one of the spasms of gentrification Austin has endured for the last 40 years. But that was yet to come. It was an old building, bare walls, no heating, or air-conditioning. The owner probably rented out the space cheap for the length of the show. Bits of cheese on crackers, tortilla chips and salsa were available to carry about on small paper plates. Generic jugs of red and white wine were scattered about the table, as well as a galvanized tub filled with the ubiquitous Shiner Bock. Blondie, The Police, or some other cross over “punk” played on a home stereo someone had set up in the corner. The artists were local college art professors trying to seem relevant to the to the gaggle of students who were there for the free beer and wine, before heading out to their own parties with live local bands. I wandered the room pretending to look at the art on the walls. The prices were too high for my part-time job and rent. Most were abstract, with a few figurative pieces trying to have an exotic southwestern feel to them. But even at 20 they felt forced and derivative.  I thought about the painting by Fantin-Latour, Un Coin De Table, where Verlaine and Rimbaud were sitting at a table with contemporary Parisian artists. The story went that one artist refused to be in the same painting as that nasty boy (Rimbaud). So where he sat the artist put a vase of flowers.  I wondered what Rimbaud would think about the conversations the students and professors were having, the fawning praise, the studiously ironic responses. I felt callow, and slightly embarrassed. I left quickly, saying I was going out for a smoke, and went home for the night to write.

    (August 11, 2017)

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  • The Indiscernible Divide of Dream and Day

    by

    borders, dream, interpretation, love, poetry, relationships, traces



    Disentangling you
    From sleep, day
    Disrupts and disturbs
    Dream like a stone
    Plopped into a pond.
    Yet dream persists
    Between the ripples;
    It lulls the stark day,
    Submerged and translucent,
    With the soft edges
    Of night’s desires.
    As you speak, I watch
    Your hands, your eyes
    Your mouth, and drown,
    indiscernibly.
    (August 9, 2017)

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  • Revisionist

    by

    barthes, communication, desire, erasure, erato, irony, loss, love, poetry, relationships, sonnets, thinking, time, ways of knowing
    “love makes me think too much”
    –Roland Barthes
    Divining the nuances of desire
    From each word she said to him,
    He teased out the conversations
    They might have had, and
    Reinscribed the one’s they did
    Into more palatable designs,
    Until variation encased him like frost
    Devouring vision across a windowpane.
    Did she say what he heard?
    Was his context close to hers?
    He could’ve asked, but fear dissuaded
    Him into quandaries of inaction,
    Until all, which might have been,
    Had drifted into oblivion.
    (August 5, 2017)

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  • love’s memory

    by

    barthes, erato, loss, love, memory, muse, poetry, relationships, traces
    “It is I who decides that its image is dead.”
    –Roland Barthes
    the flame holds
    in fragility
    a glow
    at wick’s end
    then lets go
    with finality
    a grey
    wisp of smoke

    (August 3, 2017)

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  • Always an Audience Present

    by

    clarity, communication, love, metaphor, poetics, poetry, ways of knowing

                             
                             “My nature
    is a quagmire of unresolved
    confessions.”
    –Robert Creeley

    I write as a form of confession,
    Often whispering to an empty room,
    With hope one hears, without hearing
    Enough to exhume my paltry sins.
    I bend these words like charms
    To deflect, and absorb attention
    From the demons chatting nearby.
    I speak clearly, without seeking clarity:
    Metaphors hold truths loosely
    Like flowers proffer pollen to the bees.
    Here I want you to understand,
    To lean in next to my words softly
    Enough to feel their breath on your lips.
    For what purpose does confession serve
    If a god is the only one who hears?

    (August 3, 2017)

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  • Scoria

    by

    barthes, erasure, erato, interrelationships, loss, love, muse, poetry, relationships, sonnets, Uncategorized
    “I have projected myself into the other with such power that when I am without the other I cannot recover myself, regain myself: I am lost forever.”
    –Roland Barthes
    he flung himself
    as with all
    his obsessions
    fully into the idea
    of her
    slagging off bits
    overtime
    he became some other
    diminished
    irretrievable
    a ghost
    to her
    to himself
    lost
    (July 31, 2017)

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  • Squared

    by

    erasure, humility, love, poetry, relationships
    To be true
    All parts
    Must cohere
    Dovetail
    Joints sanded
    Smooth
    Each dissolves
    Into the other
    As ice to water

    (July 29, 2017)

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  • Drowning

    by

    desire, dream, lost, love, muse, poetry, response, sonnets, traces, truth, Uncategorized
    A secret swimmer,
    She resurfaced the dream,
    Face first, hands aflutter.
    With a patient disregard,
    She waited on answers
    He was unable to give.
    As dreams are funny things,
    He hid within language,
    The danger used as camouflage
    To his intent. He held her
    In stasis, a thought no more
    Relevant than water:
    The air so pure,
    And so remote.
    (July 27, 2017)

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  • Immanent

    by

    abstract, borders, change, liminal, poetry
    Small bubbles form
    On the bottom of a pan
    Before the water
    Begins to boil.
    Everything is seen;
    Everything is hidden.
    What’s said is unheard,
    Or ignored.
    The air hangs
    Near the ground:
    Thick, and hard
    To breathe.
    Cottonwood leaves’ rattle
    Hint of a new wind.
    (August 25, 2017)

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  • Lost in an Open Field

    by

    erasure, erato, loss, love, muse, poetry, response
    In a field devoid of flowers,
    You were one – – –
    And now you’re gone.

    (August 25, 2017)

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  • A Curtain Forms and Rips

    by

    abstract, chance, change, exercise, interrelationships, mythic, poetics, poetry, sonnets

    I drop an alpha
    Bit now without
    Thought of what
    Will grow within
    A part of who
    I was turns to
    Who I transform
    Into tonight
    For now I’m lost
    In liminal locations
    Aslant to all
    Proximal thought
    With this bit of sound
    Our fabric’s torn apart

    (July 25, 2917)

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  • Happiness’ Incremental Loss

    by

    abstract, broken, change, dissatisfaction, happiness, poetry, work


    It seems to appear overnight,
    Yet, bitterness grows slowly.
    It takes time to insinuate
    Itself between one’s teeth
    Until each bite no matter
    How sweet has a cynic’s tang,
    And one cannot spit enough
    To remove the dubious sneer.
    Does it arrive with the first
    Disappointment? The first inkling
    As a child that the promise
    Was a lie?  That the stated truth
    Was no more real than god
    Waiting with a beatific smile?

    (July 23, 2017)

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